moments in my life.

well yesterday my pumpkin puss turned two months old. she is growing so fast. i would say it has been a long short two months. i knew that the transition when my morgie came would be a different new for our family, but i didnt think it would have been so hard. my son he is very high maintance. he is my only son. but when morgie came it was like rush of guilt came in and it was one of the hardest things i have ever had to deal with. i think that i didnt want the kids to feel like ooh great morgan came and now she has forgot about us or look how she looks and acts towards the baby she dont treat us like that.. and it made me feel like a wierdness about morgan..and that made me feel ever more guiltier…it was very wierd for me because i have never had to deal with this..and if you know me i am a very private person about my feeling i keep many things and emotions guarded..and i was like this should be one of the happiest times in my life and it was like a true life sucker…and that made me sad…i was like what was i thinking i am only one person because my love works so much how am i going to do all of of am i going to have enough time to show my children how much i love them…but looking back now i think that when i stopped worrying about how it was all going to happen it just started fitting into place..i remember being up a couple times a night and i would pray for peace and guidance in my life..i would just ask God for the strength to heal my body and my mind to stop worrying about this..and i remember my mother in law saying….everyday will get better the next day will be a little easier than before..and i remember that the most…i realize now looking back…why should i have worried..God will not give me more than i can handle….and now two months later..i feel so blessed… i look at my three childrens and they bring me the greastest joys in my life…they are my life and my constant reminder of how fast time flies to capture these moments and keep them in my heart forever..i never want to forget the drives from sutter were we talk about the day..wyatt will tell me all the kids that got in trouble for the day…and nat bringing home her report card and how proud her face is when she shows me how good she had done..or watching my son hit the ball the farthest ( i call it the 6-year old home run)…or the first time my morgan smiled at me..those are the moments i trully live for…and the moments like the rocky ones i dont want to forget too because they make life just so much more sweeter….

“Breath.Let Go.And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.” Oprah Winfrey


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